Lindsay Lohan

I believe Lindsay Lohan has a theory. In her mind, she believes that if she wears something really baggy over her tiny and unhealthy frame, no one will notice.

Well, L.Lo, it ain’t workin’.

Evangeline Lily

SAGGY BOOB SYNDROME. Sorry, Evangeline. I wanted to say your hair looks- SAGGY BOOB SYNDROME. Oh my god, I’m so sorry. What I’m really trying to say is you dress- SAGGY BOOB SYNRDOME. OH MY GOD PLEASE STOP IT! *silence* Okay, good. So anyways- SAGGY BOOB SYNDROME.

Sigh. I guess what I’m really trying to say is that you have saggy boob syndrome.

Rumer Willis

Rumer, let's do a quick logic problem, shall we?

This dress would be okay if your boobs were being perky and happy. They’re not. Therefore, deductive reasoning would leave us to decide that this dress is, in fact, NOT a good choice for you. Wonderful, you make quite a good pupil. Now run along home and tell mummy and not-much-older-than-you daddy what you’ve learned.