Keira Knightley

Oi, she’s doing the pouty thing again.

Sigh. Keira, how many times do I have to tell you? Poufing up your lips like a balloon isn’t going to help you at all. You look, I think, very cool and chic and almost like the hippie I once loved so much here. That dress is cool and your accessories are lax, and I’ve learned to live with the hair. So why are you still doing the poufy lip thing?! Are you going to keep doing this when you’re old and shriveled at the age of seventy when your lips will be chapped with a little furry moustache?! Why not just quit while you’re still ahead, eh? Because I can assure you that nobody wants to see this lip for the rest of their lives.